The rains , the pains and the soliloquy called love .

Brilliant, its a idle Monday morning .

I sit here on the balcony looking at the clouds that don’t subside , as if nature is unleashing her fury , her anger & frustrations . but even that is so cool , so soothing and calm .hoping that the rain would wash away all my pains, i sit expecting the little droplets to sooth my soul , to sooth the pains, to make me numb again.

Guess at 28 you are confused about life , the decisions to take the career to make and the money to earn , well these are the simple problems you can solve , for they are not as complex as emotions .

Ah well emotions my friends , be aware of them , respect them , loathe them , fear them , embrace them but experience them , the complexities and multitudes involved in it will sweep you away .Let me talk about the one emotion called love , it has so many intricate emotions in its lair , it questions your very belief , shakes your principles , drains your energy and makes you question the fundamental purpose of one’s life ? Of once birth.

But in its arms will we find the answers to our questions , the energy to better our principles & beliefs in life , the momentum to propel our soul on the path of happiness , it instils in us a sense of purpose in our ever drifting life , mind , emotions .
It is the last refuge and the last resort for all our souls, our consciousness & thoughts .
For its is not binding but liberating, it is not burdening but unburdening .
The only hindrance is that we have to surrender to it completely , let it address our fears, our inhibitions, our anger , our frustrations, our doubts , but to surrender we are scared .Then it shall set one free , by giving a simple answer , what can be and what shall not be , a clarity to realize that love when true is truth !

Truth is beauty, beauty is god , and as such god is love , and what better manifestation of god than nature ? Love is the force that creates this universe , which binds the ying & yang to create , to kill , to recycle to recreate again .

well i wouldn’t go by my own words , i would love someone more than life itself , i will love someone unconditionally , i will love someone for i was born to love her , i will love someone for that is my destiny , i will love that one till i realize completely the dimensions and multitudes of love .
And in this process i know she will hurt me , i will hurt her , we will get hurt .
We will question the very foundations of a relationship and always find an answer, we will imagine that love is nothing but , a process of pain and it is better of living without it .
But in the end we will survive this battle , we will emerge more stronger and complete than we were before , you , me and us .Only to realize that love is what completes us , it is what lets us complement each other, it is what is the goal of life , and that is to love .

True love is so complex and rare that we have to fight for it , we have to fight our feelings, inhibitions, incapability’s, restrictions , interruptions , emotions , our knowledge and our very self.Love tears your very self apart to put you back as more complete , more enriched and more enlightened , for only then you can be true to yourself .

but i wouldn’t take my word for it , for even i have to pass through these multitude of feelings , emotion & chaos , its only that the eye of a storm is the calmest , the fires have to forge us to make us stronger , love is but sacrifice of everything but love .

For my love & yours, just love and life will follow you .

Well i have been lazy , come on i shall admit it .

Well how else would i let work and a bunch of monkeys managing it let me not blog , or is it just my feeble attempt to blame them .?

So after getting to a saturation point i have decided , its too short to let it pass by isnt it .

I mean for 5 years you live life , every single day , one moment at a time and all of a sudden you see that its passing by you , too quick for you to comprehend .

the shower today just reminded me of something , a moment of happiness that i had forgotten , about an august week that was just bloody brilliant .!

I mean its Thursday evening , its raining cats & dogs and a cyclone was brewing somewhere adding more force to the rains , trying to avenge the gods themselves .

Me & Asti are gulping down some sweet rum as we think about 3 wonderful days to do nothing & free from work .

" Dude , lets do a bike trip " asti quips and i tell him to shut up , for the weather was not right , and i did not know how much of a rider he was , but then the road beckons .

The advantage of being drunk is that it helps your brain bypass the probabilities and helps it to say yes , was it stupidity ? what was the point ?

11:30 PM , we borrow a couple of rain suits , gear up completely and decide its time to go , asti gets his clothes packed & his highness is ready .

Okay driving is serious rain is injurious to health and takes a lot of concentration & tolerance , more so if its 2 guys on a Pulsar .!

12:30 PM CCD Maddur , we are soaking wet , tipsy and sore , but zipping @ 75 KMPH on wet roads is fun , you tend to feel nice , like breaking free and just cruising without a care in the world .

Mysore , 1:45 AM , we come home cold and shivering , just duck into the bed and sleep off .

We wake up to see this , what a nice way to start the mornings , get nice warm coffee served , pick a cigarette & just watch this view frm my balcony .

Maya this is , maya this shall be ...

The toughest thing to understand is silence,
The hardest thing to find is the same silence.

The yearning to break this haplessness i try,
making me realize that i am not that tough.

After all we are human , fragile but resilient.

we yell out , Why is it that we are cursed by emotions?
yet at times we indulge in them as if they are a boon.

Why is there this longing in us ?
Why is there a need for someone ?

Look into yourself , into your deep dark soul ,
bring out everything in there to light.

Dont you know you fool , you were born alone ?
see, you will die naked alone and quietly ..

when where you here to go there ?
dont you know , you were yourself just a manifestation .

Ah , maya was this , maya shall this be .
nor you can change this nor i , maya it is just maya ....